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They Want To Live Inside Us

By Saif AbuKeshek

In memory of Fadi AbuKeshek, was murdered on the March 21, 2007.

They run from a house to another, they invade the towns, camps, and cities and then they say security reasons. Israel is trying to live inside us, to create hate and fear within ourselves. Years and years of resistance are passing. Looking to this long experience of resistance, one can assume that it turned to be kind of culture to resist the occupation. It is not. Resisting the occupation is the basic reflection of any human being that wants to live in justice with dignity and rights.

I woke up two days ago with a very bad feeling, I woke up on the call of a friend who told me some troubles are happening in Nablus and at the moment I knew something wrong happened to someone I know. I called my family and then it was the news of my cousin murder. I just couldn’t say anything.

I started to call my family members and some friends, I didn’t what to do, to shout, to go back home, to run in the street. I left my bed, changed and went to my work. After some time I discovered that I spent the last two hours of work staring at the screen of my computer. Then I asked: what is it that I’m doing here and so I left back home. I kept doing things that have no meaning things that I couldn’t explain not even for myself.

Fadi AbuKeshek, 23 years old, my cousin who left us two days ago. The last image I have for him is seeing him on Al Jazeera tv while family relatives are taking the last look. Everything is moving fast, and here we are on the third day of his death and it feels like I just received the news now. He was killed during the night in the streets of our refugee camp, Old Askar refugee camp. This the ugly face of occupation, they always steal our beloved ones. They work hard to plant fear and hate in our hearts. They don’t want to occupy the land; they want to occupy us, our Souls and our spirits. Fadi, as all Palestinians, refused this occupation and chose his freedom.

And so we will do, we will follow your steps cousin, it is not our destiny to live under occupation, but it is our destiny to fight for justice and to resist for our rights. Israel can do whatever they want to do, what counts here is not what the oppressor can do, but what the oppressed is determine to achieve and we are the Palestinians determine to achieve our rights.

So go cousin Fadi, peace be with you.